Maladaptive

Red hair wet and matted eyelashes

Heavy with water 

From the lakes of my summer

Reviving sparkling sodas 

And bouncing off of the sun in eyes

That turn malt green in the light 

Snapshots only looked at twice 

Once before and once again tonight 

I hold grudges 

Like a safe holds its gold

Like a tray holds its ash

Like you held Canon corpses in your hands 

Perfect Amber cylinders 

Perfect fucking winters 

Living deaths of connections while 

I rip off nails from their beds 

Using childhood techniques 

And teeth tearing mastery 

To drip down inside me 

The salty iron honey

Nights I’m alone 

Nights that I’m done 

Breathing

A sponge for the earth

Contracting 

Heaving 

Soaking up the bleeding 

From nails that grow 

Back malformed 

I think it’s time to wash myself of you and I 

I’ve never wanted anything more 

Than to have both a painted manicure

And to have no fingernails at all

Photo by MILKOVÍ on Unsplash

4 thoughts on “Maladaptive

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